philippines, home, usa and all the space inbetween....

looking back on a place and time, i have such a different perspective than looking it straight in the face. i've only been home for a few days now, but hearing and reading all of the negative things i have written and said about my year + in the peace corp phillipines really makes me think. think about what i have accomplished, about what i have learned, and the person i have grown into. it seems when you are in a difficult situation, the tendancies are to focus on what is negative or frustrating, and overlooking all of the tiny little things that made a place in time so great. tiny things like my neighbor greeting me as i walked home every afternoon with a hearty "maayong hapon, diin ka naghalin?" -- good afternoon where have you been??? and her 15 year old smile and wave with the same excitement to see me every day.....and i still don't know her name...it's a hard one. and my same answer, "didto lang" -- just yander. or another neighbor inviting me to eat fish with him and his friends as they had their every afternoon drinks, beer mixed with rum. jeff, sher, igang, mak-mak, apol, and random others, and how it only took them 2 months to build up the courage to look me in the eyes, and another 2 months to actually unleash a "hello mam" -- and finally after a year we are making full sentences. although, we have to repeat them 2 or 3 times just to understand, we were making big strides. and my co-workers pointing out my zits and my size, well i guess there are a few things i won't miss!!!! i'm not really sure where all of this is going, but i just felt like i needed to focus on some of the good things, and some of the things that made me smile over the past year. and the amazing pcv's that have become like brothers and sisters to me. i wouldn't have made it a single day without them. so i guess it's not so bad afterall. it's funny how when removed from a situation, you are able to see the good. i am able to see the good, sucks it took so long.